My Love For Millie

We only have 1 kid. We planned to have at least 2 or 3 but God gave us only 1 daughter whom we love so much. I speak for myself when I say, as a mother, I have too much love to give and at times, I think I am already showing too much love to my daughter. I have to find another outlet to release those extra love. And then we found Millie.

Millie is our adopted Bichon Frise. We took her when she was around 5 or 6 years old already in 2008. So, she’s either 11 or 12 this year.

Millie has filled in the void of not having another child after our first born. I spoil this diva dog rotten because I have this excess love to throw around and she’s the deserving dog to have all my extra dose of love and attention. The moment I saw her from the email that circulated around, asking for loving family to adopt her, I knew right there and then, she was (and is) the one we would have in addition to our small family. It was love at first sight with our diva dog. And when we picked her up, I felt the moment she ran straight to me without even looking at her previous “parents” that she would love me just as much as I love her.

Lately, she’s been showing signs of old age. She’s starting to be less active and sleeps most parts of the day. She still enjoys walks but not the long ones but still loves car rides. Few days ago, she was down with a fever or sorts. I took her to the vet twice to make sure she’d be fine. Today, we took her again for a check up and 2nd opinion because the first vet said it was just eyes issues. But my dog lost her appetite and was restless. Although her appetite picked up again 2 days ago, her overall health has to be checked and monitored now.

I got the scare of my life today when the vet examined her. The vet was also expressing her anal sac glands to make sure she would move well as the sac glands seemed to be inflamed already.  And while the vet was doing that and I was hugging Millie, I suddenly felt Millie lost her consciousness over my shoulders and just hang her head. She stopped breathing for a moment. I panicked and put her down on the vet table while the vet assured me she was having seizures. Then Millie started breathing again and kicked a bit but the whole 10 seconds episode of seeing my Millie in that kind of manner shocked me. All of a sudden, the fear I have been trying to deny and bury came before me very eyes. One day, I will have to prepare myself for this until the very end.

I am seeing my Millie in a different perspective after that. She is no longer the young dog I have. Her age will catch up on her. Her health will fail. She will become old and weak and when it happens, I am not quite sure how I will accept it.

For now, I am enjoying her as much as I can. I don’t want to break my heart but after Millie, I may not take in another pet. I just love my Millie so much that it breaks my heart to even think of “the day.”

Just how much can you love a pet? Our Millie is not just a pet. She is FAMILY.

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